Tommy Makem

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a) There was Johnny McEldoo and McGee and me
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And a couple or two or three went on a spree one day

a) We had a bob or two, which we knew how to blew
And the beer and whiskey flew, and we all felt gay.
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b) We visited McCann's, McEloman's, Salty Dan's
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We then went into Swann's our stomachs for to pack

a) We ordered out the feed which indeed we did need
And we finished it with speed but we still felt slack
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c) Johnny McEldoo turned as blue as the dew
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And a plate of Irish stew he soon put out of sight

a) He shouted out encore with a roar for some more
That he never felt before such a keen appetite
b) He ordered eggs and ham, bread and jam, what a cram
But him we couldn't tram, though we tried our level best
a) For everything we brought, cold or hot, mattered not
It went down him like a shot but he still stood the test

c) He swallowed tripe and lard by the yard, we were scar'd
We thought it would go hard when the waiter brought the bill
a) We told him to give o'er but he swore he could lower
Twice as much again and more before he had his fill

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d) He nearly soaked a trough full of broth, says McGrawth
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He'll devour the tablecloth if you don't haul him in

a) When the waiter brought the charge McEldoo felt so large
He began to scout and barge, and his blood went on fire
b) He began to curse and swear, tear his hair in despair
And to finish the affair, called the shopman a liar

c) The shopman he threw out and no doubt he did clout
McEldoo he kicked about like an old football
a) Tattered all his clothes, broke his nose, I suppose
Nearly killed him with a few blows in no time at all
b) McEldoo began to howl and to growl, by my soul
He threw an empty bowl at the shopkeeper's head
a) Struck for Mickey Finn, peeled the skin off his chin
And the ructions did begin, and we all fought and bled

a) The peelers did arrive, man alive, four or five
And at us they made a drive for us all to march away
a) We paid for all the meat that we ate, set it straight
And went home to ruminate on the spree that day